12.8.13

The Three Scars

Being in a friendship with a guy was an interesting thing. They didn't start rumors, but they talked some new knowledge about technology, automotive, sport, and music instrument. They weren't two faced. They were honest about what they liked, and what they hated. With them, I always had some fun through their laughs, some long talks, and the things that we've done together.

Through the togetherness, I got closer with those guy best friends. I never thought of falling for them. But it happened. Somehow it left the scars, and then ruined the line between friendship and more. 


First time I had fallen for “The Forbidden Focus”. I got closer with him after our graduation. We were hanging out together, or talked about our dreams. Everything was fine, until he announced his new relationship with a girl. I didn't expect to fall, but I felt a deep sadness when he left after he had that relationship. A one side love, I thought.

He came into my life only to teach me about how to live alone. He gave a real painful of loving someone so deeply. I couldn't felt any happiness since he left. I missed his smile, his clumsy style, his wisdom, and his way of calm me down. I blamed my self for doing nothing to make him mine. He was a forbidden focus, because when I focused in our memories, the pain of losing him will hurt me so much. I’m sick of falling in love, especially with him.

I learned that one side love was tiring. We couldn't stay with someone who never loved us back. If we forced to love, and hoped that he will understand someday, we’ll be hurt by our self. I learned that waiting was wasting. When you decided to wait, you have to make sure that they're worth the wait. If he didn't worth for it, leave them. You couldn't wait forever. 


The second time happened for “Dirty Little Secret”. I gave that name because we got closer when he had a girlfriend (it was the title of a song by All American Reject. If you read the lyric, you’ll understand my story). We laughed together, we fought for something stupid. What we’re fighting for, when we weren't in a relationship. His innocent, my anger, and our selfishness mixed up then broke the things up. Something had happened; I still couldn't forgive even when he had already asked for apologizes. 

Through the anger, I learned that someone who couldn't appreciate your existence was better of being kicked. You were wasting your time of waiting their appreciation. 


I almost fall for him, because before I had fallen, I found someone new. He was “Sunshine after the Rain”, the third. I got the name from a song title, if you read the lyrics; you will know how much he means to me. I never expect to go so far with him. He was perfect type to be a friend; an interesting type of a guy. He was friendly, have a good sense of humor, and lovable. We got closer, started in a sick twisted relationship; end up in a trap of fate. 

He could make me happy with his kindness, caring, and loving. He appreciated my existence. He put much effort to comfort me. He taught me to be better.  I did care with him, so much. I couldn't get mad when he made some mistakes. I tried to be there when he needed. I wanted to make him happy, no matter what. I loved him, more than so much.

Things got wrong when a big problem hit us. He had no faith to hold me on, and I wouldn't be the only one fighting. He left me with the worst wound.  The scar remained for months. Then the time flied. The fate worked. Everything was back, as good as the beginning, I thought.

I learned how hard to forgive someone who hurt me so much. Forgiving is the hardest things to do, and forget the hurtful memories was almost-impossible. But when we put our best on it, we'll be able to forgive and forget. I learned to still be nice for him, after the bad things happened. No guilt, no grudge, and no more hatred. I did, because we couldn't cure our own sufferings by making other suffers, right ?  


Those three scars gave the best lesson to me. I had learned enough about love. Next time, when I fall for someone again, I hope he will be the last one. I don’t know who will be my last one; it may be one of them, or none of them. But I’ll be sure; the last one will be someone better, someone who will hold my hands and become the one I build my home with. 



Postingan ini diikutsertakan dalam :
Giveaway 4th Anniversary Emotional Flutter


40 comments:

空キセノ said...

Mif, kamu harus cepat move on biar postingan blogmu nggak curhatan galau terus isinya.

Asik, Miftah ikutan juga. Pokoknya kalo kamu menang aku minta traktir pasta tuna carbo-nya Coffee Taste.

:3

Kopiah Putih said...

Oh.. Ini postingan tentang galau ya.. :)
Semoga menang ya kakak..

Elang Wicakso said...

Jiahaha makanya kalo suka ndang ngomong. Cewek duluan kan lebih baik drpd direbut orang. *eh

Nizaruddin Rais said...

aku kok rasanya aneh ngerti semua orang yang mbok bahas disini =w=
huahahahahahaha kamu harus move on mif!!

Djohand Vengeance said...

Wah.. ini blog sama kayak punyanya mbak kisenosky, pake bahasa inggris. jadi gue harus nyiapin kamus abal-abal gue..

semoga aja loe bisa mencari yang terbaik..! dan bisa ngebangun rumah sama loe kayak do'a loe diparagraf terakhir.. *loh. soalnya gue cuma tau akhirnya doang.

semoga menang.!

Shry Daviid said...

galowww galoww galoooow. ayok kita move on bareng u,u)9 mahahaha

Lia Agustina Damanik said...

bingung mau komen apa. Pengalaman begituannya gak sebanyak kamu sih. Tapi, you are what you think. Thinking the best guy you'll find, (hopefully)will lead you to the happiest moment.

Moti Peacemaker said...

kok bahasa inggris....nggk apaham saya

tapi komen di atas soal move on dan sekutunya

emang kalau sudah cinta itu sulit..palagi ngelupain..sulit beuuuuddzzzz

tofik dwi pandu said...

*lagi nyari lirik dirty litlle secret-all american reject*

cewe emang gitu, kalo udah di sakitin berkali-kali dia bakalan ngomong kalo itu yg terahir dn dia akan mencari pasangan se umur hidup. biasanya gitu si.

dan satu hal, ketika kita di sakiti harusnya kita bersukur, kalo nggak tau sakitnya kita nggak bakal nyampe pada posisi sekarang.. :D

Kukuh Kurniawan said...

duh, gimana ya komennya. ini ngebahas apaan sik? kayaknya lagi ikutan giveaway gitu ya? mudahan menang deh hehehe

aseh prakoso said...

cuma ngerti paragraf terakhir, semoga nanti kalo jatuh cinta lg bener2 jd yg terakhir ya kak, cemungudh move on

Rahmat Hidayat said...

ini blog kembaran sama nisa yak, pake bahasa inggris. *siapin translate dulu*

Yak, intinya move on... Kenangan yang begitu sakit ngapain diinget lagi, tapi gapapa kalo buat dijadikan sebagai pembelajaran buat kedepannya. Cinta emang rumit, makanya saya jomblo *okesip, ini curhat*

Willy Anugrah said...

iya gue sekata sama komentar diatas.

intinya gue gak ngearti bahasa inggris deh yah..

emm, moga menang deh GA nya

Ridho Fadillah said...

And the name is ???? :3 haha

Edotz Herjunot said...

Maafkan gue termasuk salah satu anak yang gagal bahasa inggris..

Sori enggak bisa ngasih komentar yang berbobot dan layak dibaca, gue nangis nih.. Nyesel banget ;(

ahmad fauzi said...

smoga lo menaannngnggggggg.... gue dukung looooo....
gue streesss liat tulisan bahsa inggris kayak gniiii.
kalo modem gue kenceng, gue pengen translete tapi sayangnya, modem gue lagi ngambek

erickparamata said...

Cieeee Galau nihhh. Move On mbak.. Move On..
tapi Move on bukan untu melupakan,, tapi memaafkan #tsahhh

semoga menang \(O,O)/

miftah faradisa said...

aminn...
bukan...cuman setengah-galau..hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

Ak baru nyadar klo suka-nya pas dia udah direbut orang... *curhat

miftah faradisa said...

ah sudahlah lupakan apa yg km ngerti...hahaha

wes move on..tp sek gaada target baru... *curcollagi

miftah faradisa said...

iya. tapi gak smuanya pke b.ingris, kdang ak nulis pke b.indonesia jg sih...


amiinnn... iya..yg perlu diketahui cmn yg trakhir doang kok,, yg lainnya gak perlu..hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

ahaha. bagus kn lagu dan liriknya...

iyasih. yah semoga bener2 yg terakhir deh..udh capek main2 nih...hahaha

iya. bersyukur..seenggaknya aku jd tau n bsa belajar biar itu gak smp kjadian lg.. :D

miftah faradisa said...

Aminnnn...just hope the best for the last one, and end up with happiness..

miftah faradisa said...

yah.. ngelupain emg sulit banget... tp ttep harus dicoba..hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

ayoo.. semangat move-on-nya...hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

iya, lg ikutan GA nih...
aminn..hehehe

miftah faradisa said...

iya, aminnn...aminn...hehehe

miftah faradisa said...

kebetulan pas lg nulis pke bhasa Inggris..hehe

iya. dijadikan pembelajaran aja biar bisa lebih baik ke depannya...

hahaha. semangat mblo.. :D

miftah faradisa said...

hahaha. iya intinya ikut GA...
aminn...ehehe

miftah faradisa said...

hi-mit-su...alias ra-ha-si-a...hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

ahahaha. semangat bang...semangat belajar bahasa inggris... *eh

miftah faradisa said...

aminnn...
hahaha. jgn stress lah...dinikmati aja... :D

miftah faradisa said...

iya. aminn...

ini jg lg proses memaafkan...hahaha

miftah faradisa said...

ah sbnerny ak gak galau masio isi blognya berasa galau... *pembelaan *kenyataan

yah jd pngen k coffee taste.. :D

Zhie Cha Smile said...

Maaf yah miftah aku baru sempat meninggalkan jejak di sini.. duhh maaf lagi gak sempat mentranslate postingannya di atas cuma sempat baca komentar-komentarnya aja tuhh,, tentang pengalaman yang menggalaukan hati yah??? hmm baru menyadari suka sama doi setelah direbut orang huuaa ngenes banget yahh rebut kembali aja Mif #eh,, ya udah galaunya jangann terlalu larut move on segera gih n sukses yuaa buat GAnya:-)

Rahajeng Kartika said...

mif..kamu benar2 buka-bukaan.. *spechless
semangat-semangat.. :D

miftah faradisa said...

iya gpp zhie..makasih udah mampir kesini... :D

miftah faradisa said...

ayo segera update blogmu bu... --"

Claude C Kenni said...

This is the first time I visited your blog and I instantly fall in love with the way you write. The words are so deep, and touching, and so beautifully arranged. I hope you can always keep that smile and I'm sure one day you will finally found your happy ending =)

Anyway, thanks for participating in my giveaway ^^

miftah faradisa said...

Yes.. absolutely, I will find my happy ending..

Thank you for visiting...
and thank you for choosing an inspiring topic for thr first category in your giveaway.. :D